I’ve been dreaming a lot lately– which is not usual for me.
For one, I hardly slept at all until about the last six months. I would lie awake, desperate to sleep but unable to shut off my brain. I would kill time by reading, taking a bath, going for a walk, or of course– Writing.
I used to feel that if I couldn’t sleep, it was because God wanted me to write. I still feel that — and I’m becoming more obedient, even if it’s just a few graphs in my journal.
I finally broke down and got some meds that would help me sleep– it was necessary. And now I’m sleeping through the night, feeling rested– functioning so much better.
But I don’t think the dreams are a side effect of the meds. I think it’s a sign that I’m relaxing more, in general. That I’m happier.
I’m not keeping these secrets from myself, I’ve given permission for these dreams.
Until the last month or so, I rarely dreamed and they always evaporated when I awoke. I don’t grasp onto much– just a few minutes or so.
But I’m happy that finally this is becoming available to me. And they’re good dreams for the most part, although today I had a dream that was a bit anxious.
But that’s okay! They’re dreams. Just a reflection of our subconscious.
Overall I just feel like I’m onto something– as if my new confidence has also unlocked the part of me that WANTS to dream.
My imagination is coming alive! I’ve always said I don’t have much imagination– but it’s building itself, night by night.